The 12 Habits Holding Women Back Series | Habit #1

As a coach, I sometimes witness talented women hindered by self-imposed habits they’ve developed in their professional and personal lives. And, to be completely honest, I myself have fallen prey (and still often do) to these negative habits. In their book, How Women Rise, Sally Helgesen and Marshall Goldsmith identify 12 specific obstacles holding women back that can be crucial to leadership advancement.

The 12 Habits Holding Women Back:

1. Reluctance to Claim Your Achievements

2. Expecting Others to Notice and Reward Your Contributions

3. Overvaluing Expertise

4. Building Rather Than Leveraging Relationships

5. Failing to Enlist Knowledgeable Allies

6. Putting Your Job Before Your Career

7. The Perfection Trap

8. The Disease to Please

9. Minimizing

10. Too Much Emotion, Too Many Words

11. Ruminating

12. Letting Emotional Radar Distract You

These habits can have far-reaching consequences on career advancement and personal growth. Let’s explore why, and address what we can do about it.

In this recurring Thought Space series, we'll dive into each habit to examine its impact and provide actionable strategies to overcome it.

Starting with Habit #1: The Reluctance to Claim Your Achievements

As women continue to break barriers in the workplace, a subtle yet pervasive obstacle that often stands in their way is reluctance to claim their achievements. 

The Problem with Playing It Down

Women often downplay their accomplishments, fearing that they might be seen as boastful or arrogant. However, this hesitation to self-promote can:

• Diminish visibility and recognition

• Stifle career growth and opportunities

• Reinforce harmful stereotypes about women's capabilities

Why Women Struggle to Claim Their Achievements

Research suggests that:

• Women are socialized to prioritize humility over self-promotion

• A fear of being perceived as "too ambitious" or "too confident" holds them back

• Cultural expectations emphasize collaboration over individual achievement

The Cost of Silence

When women fail to claim their achievements:

• Their contributions go unnoticed and unvalued

• Opportunities for advancement and leadership are missed

• The gender gap in pay and representation persists

Break the Silence: Strategies for Claiming Your Achievements

1. Track Your Accomplishments Keep a record of your successes, no matter how small.
   

2. Reframe Self-Promotion View it as essential to career growth, not boastful.
   

3. Prepare Your Elevator Pitch Articulate both your value and achievements concisely.
   

4. Seek Feedback and Endorsement Encourage others to recognize your work.
   

5. Celebrate Milestones Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements outwardly.

Take Action

By recognizing and overcoming the reluctance to claim achievements, women can rise to their full potential. Here are a few immediate questions to ask yourself on your journey toward taking space and claiming your achievements. 

• What is one achievement you've downplayed in the past that you can reframe as a strength?

• Who can you share your accomplishments with? (A colleague? A mentor?)

• What career goals do you have for your future and how can self-promotion help get you there? 

Developing a self-promotion strategy tailored to your goals is a fantastic starting point and something I can help with. Connect with me to explore executive coaching opportunities and together, let’s build better tables, better leaders, and better business. The future of business is diverse.